Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler has been a big part of my teenage years, to be honest. And it has been the stepping stones in my artistic journey, always inspiring me to take things further and push myself. I'm just going to talk about it a little bit, because of a decision I have made regarding it. As I've become a fairly prolific artist for this fandom, I figure I should announce it?? even if it's not that important. anyway~ *dream sequence sparkles*
How I got into the fandom isn't really a story to tell the children haha. A fanfiction was submitted to a popular group I founded a few years ago, and I looked it up. Needless to say, I was captured by the beautiful animation, soundtrack, dark storyline, characters, and blatant homoerotic subtext between the two protagonists. It was really everything I could have wanted, and took over my life.
But I have to admit, in some ways, it might have hindered me.
To begin with, Kuroshitsuji was what first really led me into roleplaying. Roleplaying is fun with the right people, but in my important high school years, it practically took over my life. I know that having depression + anxiety was really detrimental to how well I did in school, and roleplaying was a wonderful way to not be myself. But I know I neglected my studies in favour of roleplay, or just drawing Kuroshitsuji fanart in general, and as a result I achieved less than what I could have in the HSC.
I wish I could have focused just a little bit more, because I had potential, but there is really no one to blame but myself.
I made a bunch of good friends from this fandom. As most of you know, I met my sweetheart Moiscen by way of their Kuroshitsuji fanart. When I saw that they drew a ship I particularly loathe, I thought to myself, I should just avoid this person and their art entirely. And now, like two years later, this person is my dear precious partner and we're just really happy with each other. (and moi, it turns out, was never a fan of said foul pairing. win win~)
Secondly, I met PiefaceMcGee, possibly through said popular group I ran. We had a lot in common, it turned out, especially in terms of ships and all that. We began RPing together and ?? now I consider her my best friend. <3
It's also worth mentioning The Golden Gaytimes, a splendid LGBT group of writers I formed to assist me with the script of a Kuroshitsuji otome dating game, which sadly just. didn't happen. I've made good friends with these people, even when the game fell through we all kept chatting <3 ,
And the people I have become friends with on DA, people who were fans of my work, who have stuck with me and supported me through all my ups and downs.
But with friends, alas, come enemies. There were friendships that just didn't work out, ones that became fiercely hostile, and people who outright wanted to attack me. People who wanted to argue about ideals. But to them...I simply just don't give a fuck. I think that there's too much going on in the world to give a shit about the opinion of some greasy white teenager hunched over their computer somewhere in America. And I think that's something everybody should pay attention to. It just doesn't matter <3 Anything that is unnecessarily harmful to my life needs to gtfo.
I move on to the point of this, sorta. Kuroshitsuji has done more good than harm, I personally believe. But now that I've left my teenage years behind, it has come to the point that the mere mention of Kuroshitsuji makes me shudder. And that has been hard to come to terms with, since I still love the characters to pieces. And I'll say this: Nobody needed a live action movie where Ciel was a girl. Nobody needed a godawful remake of a perfect musical. And nobody needed Season 3. But that's beside the point I look around, and all my friends who I'd spent my teen years loving Kuro with have moved the hell on from this toxic fandom.
I look around and I see whiny sjw kids climbing over themselves to tell me to address Grell with female pronouns, or what is 'out of character' for someone, like I haven't spent 5 years building and developing these characters in my own head. It's gross. And I need to well and truly cut ties. (nb: my attempts in the past have...not been successful XD but even then I knew it had to go)
Aaaanyway! I made this the other day:
and I knew once it was finished that I want my art to look like that. Not this:
whoa i ran out of steam for this journal and might have gone off on a tangent XD exhausted anyway bye kuro fandom you may not hold me back anymore, i don't care if you unfollow me if that's all you watched me for c: hey i rhymed
I must go forth and progress as an artist and draw cute cotton candy guro galaxy boys C: . If you have any questions, please ask them!!
i'm not being strict about what i will or won't draw in the future, just v. little kuro cause I'm leaving it behind and moving on to better fandoms yes anyway
.... i'm gonna be free!
<s>hehe get it cause i'm drawing swimming homos</s>